OniStuck
by I Am Sweden
Summary: Summary: Hetaoni Human AU. When John heard about the haunted house, he knew it was the best way to spend time with his friends while they were together for the summer! But things quickly turned from fun to horror as one by one his friends were taken by the house. Can he save them before time runs out, or is all hope gone?
1. Chapter 1

**This chapter covers about three parts in HetaOni (I think). Since things start to pick up pace in later parts, the next chapters might cover one part at a time. I've also got an ending planned, so the story won't just cut off where HetaOni does. Yay!**

**I hope everyone enjoys!**

**OniStuck**

**Chapter 1-**

Rose shielded her eyes from the sun as she peered up at the looming mansion. Personally, she didn't really find it as interesting as John apparently did. He had been talking about it for hours before meeting up with Dave. Roxy, her _beloved_ sister had tagged along, inviting three of her friends. Rose couldn't complain, though. Having more people for their sleepover (though both John and Dave argued that they were far too manly to engage in something as lame and effeminate as a sleepover; they were merely _spending the night with some friends_) would be fun. Also, John would be able to better enjoy playing jokes on more than just her, Dave, and Jade.

She was certain that was why John had insisted they come to the mansion, which apparently boasted quite the legend in his town. Rose had no way of confirming this since John was basically the only person she knew in Seattle, but she decided to humor him anyway.

"It certainly seems imposing," Rose noted, sizing the mansion up. The windows were all barred with rusted grates, the ornate scaffolding belonged to a more antique architecture, and by merely staring at it she couldn't help but involuntarily shiver. It seemed to be a lovely place despite its creepy vibes. The mansion was a recluse far outside of Seattle, cozy in a foggier part of the woods.

"Nah," Dave shrugged. "It doesn't seem all that special to me."

"Maybe that's 'cause you're just scared?" John cackled. "You know, you can always go back to the hotel. We can meet up with you again tomorrow-"

"Shut up, Egbert. I'm the one that brought the Skittles. How can His Royal Wussiness survive a scary night in a haunted house without my life-saving provisions?"

Roxy giggled, slinging an arm around Rose's shoulders. Ugh, she still smelled like this morning's dozen martinis. Rose petulantly picked her arm off of her shoulders and stepped toward the house for further examination. She was both relieved and worried that Roxy had joined in Dave and John's conversation. She was finally leaving Rose alone, but she was also acting blatantly drunk around Rose's best friends. At least Jade wasn't here to hear her inebriated sister's ramblings.

As Rose reached for the doorknob, John uneasily spoke up. "Um, are we sure we brought everything? I don't think I brought phone charger, so maybe I should-"

"John, the house has neither electricity nor phone service," Rose pointed out.

"No, maybe he's right," Roxy worriedly piped up, anxiously biting her lip. "I dunno if I packed all my alcohol. I don't want to leave any at the hotel because the maids might take it. You can't trust the maids. They're evil."

Rose testily sighed, feeling a migraine beginning to form. She pushed the door open and dragged her sister inside. Dave whistled as he walked inside. "She's a keeper, Egbert."

John swallowed hard. "…Yeah. So, um, how about we split up and look around the place? We can find some good hiding places so we can scare the others when they get here."

Roxy cackled, punching the air. "Yes! I am so going to scare the short-shorts right off Jakey's butt! I'm going this way, okay, guys?" She took off in a slightly wobbly run. It didn't take long for her to trip and fall, but she was right back at it with a chipper, "I'm alright!"

"I knew I shouldn't have let her come," Rose grumbled. "She's likely to break everything in this house with her stupid tripping. I'm sorry if she ruins your plans, John."

"No, it's okay," he grinned. He nodded to the left. "I'll start over here. Uh, you two can do whatever."

Rose waited until John had turned the corner before sighing. "Does he seem a little odd to you, Dave?"

"How so?" he asked, walking towards the far end of the hall. He opened a door and stuck his head inside. "Whoa. This library is huge. I think I found where you'd want to look around."

She ignored the bit about the library (though it did pique her interest). "I'm not certain, but it is abnormal that would want to stall us outside. Normally, John would be eager to get something like this started as soon as possible."

"I think he's secretly scared but doesn't want to let it show. Maybe ghosts are one of those irrational phobias you swear we have," Dave absently guessed, poking around in a flowerpot. The crusty remains of very dead flowers were settled at the bottom.

"Your puppet phobia is very real, Dave."

"Well, thank God my bro's not here yet. Ooh, cool, I found the kitchen. See you in a bit. And try to enjoy yourself and not spend the entire afternoon worrying about John. I'm sure he's fine. If anything, he's just upset that Karkat and Kanaya didn't want to come."

Rose wasn't convinced, but didn't press the issue further. She stepped in the shadowed library, resolved to find something interesting to read while everyone goofed off.

((((()))))

The first thing Dave did was yank open the fridge, hoping to find some fifty-year-old apple juice.

Unfortunately, there was no apple juice.

Was it bad that Dave then immediately checked all of the cabinets for food? Well, he did, and was quite disappointed when he found nothing more than a thick layer of dust. However, eerily, it looked like someone had smudged letters into the dust. Dave could almost make out the word "help" hastily scrawled. He rolled his eyes. "Got me shaking in my boots, John," he muttered. Most of the drawers were also empty, devoid of silverware and cooking utensils. There were a few plates, however, and one had fallen in the floor and shattered. Dave's face lit up as he picked up one of the bigger shards. He would wake up John in the middle of the night and act like he was about to stab him, and Egbert's shrill scream would be sweet music to his ears.

Speaking of music, Dave wished he had brought his ipod along. He didn't like silence, and the first time someone (read: Jade) suggested they start singing Disney songs, he was sure he would snap and kill everyone. Or probably not, since it'd be pretty ironic to join in with her. Dirk would definitely approve. As he made his way out of the kitchen, he wondered when his bro would arrive with Jade and Roxy's friends. Apparently Terezi and that weirdo Gamzee dude decided to come with them, because Karkat had ranted and raved until Terezi had had enough, and apparently Gamzee had a thing for John's cousin. Poor Jane.

Dave peeked into the library, where Rose had already nestled herself into a comfortable pile of books. He wriggled his eyebrows at her, and she threateningly held up one of the bigger tomes. Laughing, he backed away and left her to it.

He really didn't feel like scouting out the second floor, mostly because he was too lazy to tackle the tall, imposing stairs, and certainly not because he was afraid to go up there alone. Dave thought all of this was pretty stupid, really. Like, seriously. Haunted houses and sleepovers were dumb stuff they did back when they were thirteen. The last time Dave checked, he was sixteen and much too old for this. But it wasn't like he could complain. It had been a year since they had gotten to meet up face-to-face like this. It had been even longer since Roxy, Dirk, Jake, and Jane had been able to come, too.

So whether or not they were goofing around in some old, abandoned house was beside the point, as long as they were goofing around together.

Dave turned into the hallway John had gone to. He paused, eyes falling on the huge, gray figure stepping through the last door at the end of the hall.

Although he wasn't scared-

A scream suddenly sounded from somewhere in the house. Okay, so he was a little freaked now. "Rose?" he shouted, running back to the library. He tried to keep himself from panicking when he found the library empty, her fort of books knocked over and strewn across the floor. "ROSE?"

Dave leaned back against the wall and took a deep breath. "Dang it, John," he muttered. He weakly laughed, shaking his head. "Getting Rose in on this- that was good. That was good." In a shout, he promised, "I'm kicking your butt when I find you, John!"

Angry at himself for falling for their stupid trick, he marched upstairs. The second floor was just as dusty and dark as the first, and just as eerily quiet. Dave peeked into the first few rooms, where only dimly lit antique furniture greeted him. He found it odd that even in the bedrooms there was an interesting lack of beds. Maybe a rich Japanese family had lived here and they only slept on futons? Maybe they had crappy swords. He hadn't been able to bring any of his along to show off since airport security was as lame as always.

The next door he came to was cracked open. He hoped it was John, so he could smack him. Instead of finding his friend, he found a metal door and a vague hammering noise. Dave hesitantly pulled the metal door open.

A disheveled Rose looked back at him. "Dave," she blinked. "A-are you okay?"

He rolled his eyes. John must have gotten some serious blackmail on her if she was putting her acting skills to work. She promptly smacked his arm. "Of course. I mean, it's not like there's some huge guy dressed in a gray suit walking around."

"Obviously you didn't get a good look at it," Rose murmured, stepping out of the shadowy closet. She shut the door before Dave could ask any questions about it. Her eyes next flickered to the bedroom door. "Lock that," she commanded. "Unless you'd like to help me look for Roxy? I believe I may have heard her scream."

"Wait, that wasn't you?" Dave hesitantly asked. He cleared his throat. If he gave Rose the impression that he fell for their joke-

"Dave, this is not one of John's tricks!" Rose snapped. She popped her head out into the hall, giving it a thorough check. Upon finding a lack of giant gray monsters, she waved Dave along. "I-I'm not certain what it is, actually," she began, always examining the area. "Maybe some idiot heard we were coming here and decided to try and rough us up a little? Though I'm certain John would never hire someone to attack me. His tricks are stupid and childish, not devious."

Apparently she had never been seen him on April Fools' Day. But like a good friend, he kept his mouth shut and allowed her to continue theorizing. "Anyway, I was sitting in the library, looking at some of the older collections, when the door opened. I expected to see you again so I threw a book-"

Dave paused to cast her a pout. "You would have thrown a book at me? Rose, I believe we need to have the 'violence is not the answer' discussion again."

"Shut up, Strider. As I was saying, I threw a book and hit a hulking mass of gray, naked flesh."

"Whoa whoa _whoa!_ You are _not_ turning this story into one of your wizard pornos!"

"It didn't even have extremities! Besides, I have never, nor will I ever, partake in the writing of wizard porno. I cannot say the same for my sister, however."

"You two are so messed up."

"Thank you. Now let me continue my story. I was perfectly aware this individual was, well, an _individual_, but I couldn't find any zippers on the suit. There were no buttons, and its skin looked like actual _skin _instead of a rubber or fabric."

"…So you're saying this thing is, like, some sort of monster out to get us? That has absolutely no relation to John whatsoever?"

Rose shrugged, pursing her lips. "I'm not sure what I'm saying. However, I do know that we need to find Roxy and John before they come into contact with it_._"

As they searched for Roxy and John in the rest of the rooms on the second floor, Rose and Dave were quiet. They popped their heads into each new bedroom and meeting hall, scoured every inch for any information, then met each other's eyes and moved on. The rooms were nearly as bare as the others, and just as dusty. Only one room, located at the far end of the left hall, had piqued their interest. Upon opening the door, both Rose and Dave shivered for some inexplicable reason.

Dave was ready to give up on finding Roxy and John in favor of high-tailing it outside when he heard a soft click.

"Door on the left," Rose nodded, taking off. Already tensing at the thought of it being the Thing again, Dave hurried after her. Rose bit her lip, reaching for the doorknob. She gave Dave a hesitant glance before turning it. Sighing, she jiggled the locked door, and stepped back to give Dave room to work his magic. He took a moment to examine it- Rose slapped him again- and gave it a solid kick. The door rattled on its hinges.

They heard a squeak from within. Rose could have melted in relief. "Roxy, it's me and Dave," she called, jiggling the doorknob again.

"How can I be sure you're not a minion of Cthulu or something?" the shaky voice replied.

"Roxanne Dolores Lalonde, open this door or I will begin quoting your obscene fanfiction to David."

Dave winced at her tone- and at the usage of David. There was no David Strider. Someone as lame and dorky as that dude would have instantaneously combusted the first time his name preceded the envied and prestigious surname Strider. It was a common fact. That was why his name was Dave, not- ugh, he couldn't bring himself to even think of the horrid nomenclature. What was more cringe-worthy, did he just use the word _nomenclature? _He had been spending _way_ too much time around Rose.

Rose's threat must have done the trick, for Roxy quickly unlocked the door. She practically dragged them inside and locked the door back behind her. The blonde ran a hand through her disheveled hair and dropped to the floor. "Guys, this house is seriously screwed up. There's this- this _thing_ chasing me. At least, it was. I think I finally lost it. It was gray and stark naked and it had these huge black eyes!" As she rambled, she pulled over her backpack and withdrew a half-empty bottle of wine. Roxy paused long enough to take a swig.

"Give me that," Rose snapped, lifting the bottle out of her grasp. Roxy reached for it but didn't stand. Instead, she sighed, shaking her head. "I swear I am not drank. Durnk. Ugh! Okay, so maybe I'm a _little_ dur…unk, but I did not make this up! There really was a monster running after me!"

"We know. We saw it too," Rose said calmly. Dave was amazed she could still pull out her therapist voice while she was freaked too. But her soothing tone calmed down Roxy enough for her to cease spluttering. Rose sat down on the crispy carpet, gently smiling. She yanked hard on Dave's wrist, pulling him down too. "And it's okay, Roxy. Whoever it is, we can hunt them down later and utterly and publically humiliate them. First we need to find John. Do you know where he is?"

Roxy shook her head again. Although she tried to keep her gaze locked onto Rose, she couldn't help but wander towards her drink again. Rose placed it behind her back. "Your liver is going to rot before you reach twenty-three."

"I don't care," she muttered.

"Maybe you don't," Rose scathingly said, "but there are others who _do _care. Could you possibly spare us an iota of thought before you drink yourself silly?"

Dave really did not want to sit through this kind of conversation, especially since stubborn tears were starting to pool in Roxy's eyes. He carefully stood, casting Rose an imploring look. Since she didn't yank his arm off in response, he assumed she was cool with it. The first thing that caught his eye when he turned around was a set of swords hanging on the wall. He was glad Rose was too preoccupied with lecturing her sister to notice his mouth pop open in a gape. She swore that he had an unhealthy love of sharp objects, along with an absurd phobia of puppets (although she may have been on to something with that one…).

Right now Dave didn't care. He reverently picked up the first katana. Its sheath was orange velvet, traced along the sides with wispy chrysanthemums and a coiling black dragon. The blade was spotless- no trace of age of use could be found on its gleaming, reflective surface.

It was on this gleaming, reflective surface that he noticed two very large foot-shaped shadows under the door. "Move!" he shouted. The door violently rattled as something slammed into it. Dave pulled the girls to their feet, dragging them behind him. He threw the sword sheath to the side.

"Dave, you can't attack it! What if there's someone in the suit?" Rose burst.

"Do you seriously think there's someone in a _suit_ trying to kill us?" he hotly retorted. The door shook again, and he snapped his head forward. "I'm going to hold it off. You two run outside and find John. I'll meet up with you in a while, then we can get out of this place."

Roxy shook her head. "We can't just leave you. Do you know what Dirk will do to me if I let something touch you?"

Dirk would not be pleased. No one messed with Dirk Strider's little brother except him. Anyone else suicidal enough to try…. Well, the idiot that picked a fight with him over Terezi last year was still in the hospital as far as Dave knew. Thanks to Terezi's awesome lawyer mom, Dave and Dirk were freed of all charges. But this wasn't a snotty kid with a thing for Dave's hot, blind best friend. This was most likely a giant freaking monster out to grind their bones and snack on their flesh.

Dave kept his blade at the ready, falling easily into his kendo stance. Those ten years of kendo classes with Dirk were really paying off now. Roxy and Rose stood behind him, glaring uncertainly at the door. A moment passed, and there was silence. Dave could still see the shadows at the door, so he knew the monster wasn't gone. They waited longer, holding bated breaths, ready for anything.

The shadows moved away. Rose was the first person to exhale, patting Dave on the shoulder. He stiffly nodded, lowering the katana. "Is it… is it gone?" Roxy whispered, leaning over their shoulders to peer at the door crack.

"I think so," Dave murmured. He retrieved his sword sheath. He then grabbed the other katana, a slightly shorter one in a red sheath. Ignoring Rose's inaudible sigh, he moved slowly to the door. At Roxy and Rose's nod, he unlocked the door.

A huge gray hand swung out at him, slamming into the side of his face. Dave cried out in both pain in surprise, hitting the floor with a heavy thud. His vision swam for a brief moment, but he shook it off and reached for one of the katanas… that had flown out of his hand upon impact. Dave cursed and scrambled out of the way of the monster's foot. It stomped down on the spot Dave's head had been.

Rose pulled him to his feet and out of the way, yelling something Dave couldn't quite catch. His head was still reeling from the hit and his close encounter. He caught sight of the swords, laying a few feet away. If he could grab one, he could easily get rid of this thing. The only problem with his plan was that the monster stood between him and the katanas. He eloquently cursed again. Rose pushed his head down as a chair came flying overhead. "Come and get me, Ugly!" Roxy crowed. The monster turned towards her and the snarky grin wiped off her face. "Oh crap."

Dave made a dash for the swords, diving past the distracted monster. He yanked the smaller sword out and slashed at the monster's back. Dave's eyes went wide to feel how tough the thing's skin was. Although the sword did cut into it, it was too shallow of a wound to actually kill it. Roxy threw another chair, but the monster already noticed Dave crouched behind it. It swung another monstrous hand out, but lithely dodged this one, ducking down low. He stabbed forward, nailing the thing in the stomach. Once again, no blood came out, and the monster didn't make a sound. Dave desperately tried to pull the blade back out before it could smash his skull in, but there was no need. His sword _dropped through _the monster as it faded away.

He gaped again, dropping the sword. "D-disappeared? It freaking _disappeared?_" he spluttered.

"Doesn't matter!" Rose burst, tugging at his arm. "We have to leave before it comes back!"

Roxy scooped up the orange katana, running down the hall after them. Rose shot up the steps, dragging Dave along, impatiently tugging at him when he stumbled. The fear in her eyes almost made Dave sick. Rose wasn't afraid of anything, especially monsters and other creepy stuff. She loved horror movies and stories. Dave was sure she was H.P. Lovecraft's biggest fan.

They didn't stop running until they reached the fourth floor and ran out of stairs to climb. The three stood huffing in the middle of the hall, practically collapsing against the walls. Roxy had managed to dislodge another beer during their sprint, and now took a gulp of it. Dave couldn't handle any more of their Lalonde bickering, so he turned Rose away. "Let's look around here. John might have seen it and ran up here."

"Run," she shakily corrected him. "He might have seen it and _run _up here."

"Dang it, Rose, I'm from _Texas._ We don't believe in proper grammar down south."

"Obviously," she weakly smirked. Dave still faltered to see her ragged expression, so he kept his eyes trained on either his bright, douchey sneakers or the interiors of the rooms they checked. Again, most seemed to be bedrooms with a large study in the far corner of the floor. Unfortunately, there were no other crappy katanas to be found.

When their search came up empty, they returned to Roxy and an empty bottle. Certainly tipsier than before, she sluggishly waved to them and picked up her bottle. "Imma slug his butt," she cheerfully said.

"You'd probably puke on him first," Rose grumbled. She took one of Roxy's arms and slung it over her shoulders. Dave followed her lead. Their descent to the third floor was mostly uneventful, as Roxy (regrettably) didn't fall down the stairs. At some point, someone had to trip, and Dave would get to quote his comic. He _lived_ to make bad jokes about his comic.

"How about you two hang out somewhere and I'll look for John," Dave proposed. He honestly couldn't take any more drunk Roxy or murderously angry Rose. They poked into a white room surrounded by bookcases. In the middle of the large space sat a lone ivory piano, pristinely bright. Dave half expected John to be here if anywhere, since he liked to play the piano so much. He would never admit it to him, but Dave thought it was pretty cool, even if it was classical music. "You can lock the door in here, so I think you two will okay," Dave said. He handed Rose the red sword. Hopefully she wouldn't have to use it, but Dave was too much of a gentleman to leave them unprotected.

Roxy suddenly slumped over, banging on the piano keys. The noise resonated throughout the room, which had excellent acoustics. The ringing would probably resound through the entire floor, and maybe the others, too.

"Dang it, Roxy," Dave muttered. "Stay here. Don't open the door unless I'm back with John."

"You don't have to worry about me, Dave," Rose sighed, hugging the sword to her chest nonetheless. "I wore my big girl pants today."

He quirked a grin and slid out the door. "Alright!" he began, rubbing his hands together. "Now, if I was a wild Egbert, where would my habitat be?"

Dave heard a muffled shout. He whirled back to the piano room and stuck his ear to the door, panic filling his veins. All was quiet except for the sound of Roxy's snoring. He the muffled shout again. It almost sounded like some idiot was yelling… for him?

"John!" he burst. Dave skidded to a halt at the next door. He banged on the door. "John, are you in there?"

"Dave!"

He could have melted in relief at John's goofy voice. However, he kept his cool and opened the door. Except the door didn't open. It was locked. "You know, John, it's hard to open a door when it's locked."

"Uh… about that." And there was his special John Migraine! John nervously laughed, "Well, I saw this huge monster thing. I guess you guys have seen it too, with all the running you've been doing. Anyway, I ran in here, but forgot to lock the door. It didn't follow me inside, so I thought, 'hey, cool, I lost it!'. But when I tried to leave… the door was locked. The freaking monster trapped me in here, Dave. What if I landed in its trap? It could be coming back to EAT ME ANY MINUTE NOW!"

Dave rolled his eyes. "It's not going to eat you. You'd probably taste like boogers."

"For the last time, it was a _slime monster_ on my shirt, okay? _Not_ radioactive mucus."

"That's what they all say. Anyway, I'll look around for your stupid key. Read a book or something."

John knocked at the door- probably kicking it or face planting into it. "I've been stuck in this library for, like, two hours, Dave. I'm tired of skimming through old English."

"Then find something else to keep you occupied. I know you can be creative if you put your thinking cap on!"

John muttered something about how he was going to smack him with his thinking cap as soon as he got out of this stupid library. Dave chuckled and promised to be back soon. Before he left for the first floor library (which had been the first location to pop up in his head), he went back and told Rose that John had been found.

The walk downstairs was quiet and uneventful. There was no sign of the monster anywhere, which made Dave unsure of whether or not that was a good thing. It had to be intelligent if it had tricked him and locked John in the upstairs library. It was fully capable of ambushing him, so Dave kept on-edge. When he had arrived at the library, the door was shut. He couldn't quite remember, but he had a sinking feeling that he hadn't shut the door after discovering Rose was gone. Tentatively, he lightly turned the doorknob. He then kicked the door open and slashed. No giant gray hands tried to smash his skull in. Dave allowed him to sigh in relief. Maybe it had decided to go to lunch or something? Hopefully it really wasn't a man-eating monster. It would really suck if John had been right. Dave shook his head, trying to shake the thought out of his mind. Whatever was going on, he was sure they'd be okay. There was still the possibility that this was an elaborate trick gone wrong. For all he knew, someone could have slipped him some acid and he was just imagining all this. Probably not, but it was more feasible than a stark-naked gray monster running around trying to kill them.

The library was dark, only barely illuminated by the twilight streaming through the door. Books lay scattered across the ground from Rose's first encounter with the thing, strewn haphazardly in his path. Dave unceremoniously kicked them out of his way, paying them little mind. It wasn't like any of these were really important. None of his friends- besides Rose and maybe Kanaya because of Rose- would ever consider leafing through moldy tomes like this.

He made himself focus on finding John's key. There were no secret keys hidden in the shelves, but Dave did manage to find a few ancient volumes of manga. They were all in Japanese and the art was vintage, so he decided to keep them for Dirk, who actually knew Japanese and preferred the older stuff over the new. His old Sailor Moon manga was worn and beaten, while most of the manga Dave kept throwing at him on Christmas were still in pristine condition.

Dave moved on to the desks, trying to look faster since he was losing more and more daylight to work with. The first desk held nothing but old ink pens and a few crispy, meaningless papers. The next held the same, but in the back of the bottom drawer there was crumpled origami bird and tube of bright red lipstick. The final desk appeared to be the same case as the formers, but the top drawer was jammed. He tugged harder on it, finally yanking it out. It was almost impossible to see anything now, so he had to rely on touch to look for anything. Right as the door slammed shut behind him, his fingers grazed something metal and key-shaped.

He grabbed the key and swirled around, sword tight in hand. He strained his ears, listening for the heavy footsteps of the monster. For a moment, there was silence. Then, he heard a book drop. Dave bolted, running towards the door. He wildly swung out his sword, hoping to either ward the monster off or at least further injure it. Dave scrambled, feeling the back wall, trying to find the door. The footsteps lumbered closer after him, each step making his heart beat faster. He was sure he was on the verge of a heart attack when he finally found the doorknob. He ran outside and slammed the door behind him. Wasting no time, he ran upstairs, stumbling as he went. Thankfully he wasn't the idiot that would fall down the stairs.

He was out of breath but thankfully not as freaked out when he reached the third floor. "John, you owe me your life," he huffed, jabbing the key he had found in the library door. He wasn't a religious man, but he thanked God anyway that he had somehow found the right key. John flew out the door, tackling into him in a hug. Dave pushed him off. "Dude. _No._"

"I'm just glad you're okay!" he burst in that idiotic way only John could pull off.

"'Course I'm okay," Dave muttered. "Now come on, Rose is probably freaked."

"Rose? Freaked?" he asked incredulously. "No way. _You _would freak out before Rose would."

Dave didn't want to mention that everyone was pretty freaked at the moment. Well, everyone except John. Even before, he hadn't sounded too scared, though he was locked up and trapped like a fly in a spider's web. Speaking of spiders, Dave vaguely wondered where they all were. Not once had he seen a spider since they arrived. He hadn't found any cockroaches or other usual occupants of an abandoned house. Maybe they didn't like sharing with a giant monster? Dave didn't blame them. This place was spooky as heck. As soon as they got out, Dave swore he would strangle John for taking them here.

Rose and Roxy, awake and irritable, greeted them at the door. Rose smiled to John, relieved to finally see him. He cheerfully waved to her and burst into story mode. Rose didn't bother to tell him to shut up, even though he was making noise to attract the monster and she had already heard the story from Dave. He figured she was just glad they were all here and ready to leave.

John suddenly stopped at the top of the stairs. "Uh… I doubt this is the best time, but… we kinda can't leave."

Rose stiffened. She slowly turned with an impossibly calm face. "…Excuse me?"

He flinched at her voice, quickly looking away from her. "The front door is locked. I tried it when I first saw the monster. I messed with the lock, but it wouldn't open, no matter what I tried. I think it needs a key to work."

"A key for the inside of the front door?" Dave asked.

John shrugged. "I guess it's possible! I mean, if there's a monster walking around in here, why can't it magically mess with the door and lock us in, too?"

Roxy let out a soft whine. "We're stuckin the house? With no cell phone service? While the others apparently just decided to ditch us?"

Dave and Rose's eyes widened. That's right… it was way past time for them to arrive. If the front door was locked, surely they would have been suspicious, right? They would have tried to break in and look for them- at least, Dirk and Jade would have. Did they really decide not to come anyway? Dave was glad they hadn't gotten themselves into this mess, but it also meant they had no way of getting out without finding the front door key. They would have to scour the entire mansion looking for it. There was no telling how long it would take.

John was the first person to speak up again, quietly saying, "We shouldn't stay out in the hall like this. We need to go to a safe room. I have a key for a room on the second floor, so… maybe there?"

"It'd be best," Rose finally determined. "The monster doesn't seem able to break down doors, and the key would be extra protection, I suppose. I think the only locked door on the second floor was the one at the end of the hall, right, Dave?"

"Yeah, across from the weird room," he nodded in affirmation. He led them downstairs to their new safe room, hoping that it would actually be safe for the night. Actually, that was a bit of a problem. "Do you really think the door will hold the thing back? I mean, if it does manage to break in, it can kill us in our sleep."

When no one piped up, only giving each other nervous looks, Dave put out his fist. "Whoever loses stays up and guards the door," he quietly proposed.

They silently played Rock, Paper, Scissors. John and Rose both chose rock to Dave's scissors, but Roxy had paper. The older Lalonde made an utterly repulsed and terrified face. "Nuh-uh," she snarled. "Best two out of three!"

"Relax, Roxy," Rose sighed. "It's not like anything is going to happen. It's just a precaution."

"B-but," she stuttered, watching as Dave and John started unpacking John's hiking backpack. They had stuffed their sleeping bags and flashlights in it. Rose held the snacks and water bottles in her smaller backpack, and Dave had earlier mentioned he had brought the candy. They were hardly prepared to stay in the house longer than two days. But they tried to think about that as they readied to settle in for the night.

((((()))))

All of Roxy's twittering was ignored as her sister, Dave, and John settled in for sleep, all huddled in the corner of the room together. The sun had officially gone down, darkening everything. Roxy wasn't about to lie and mentally assure herself she wasn't scared. She was terrified, sitting in the dark, staring at the door. She had turned on her phone to give her some light as she stayed up alone, but it wasn't helping matters. The house was too quiet. She couldn't hear anything going on outside, either. The glass on the barred window must have been thick enough to block out noise. Through the dirty glass and metal bars, Roxy could see the moon. It was a little comforting, but it didn't dissipate her fear.

She nervously took another swing of her wine. The alcohol clouded her mind little by little, helping about as much as the moon did. Still, it wasn't like she _wasn't_ going to drink, so drink she did.

A couple hours had passed according to her phone when she finally heard something besides Dave's snoring. Roxy went rigid, grabbing the Swiss army knife John had packed in his huge hiking backpack. She edged towards the door, swallowing hard. The knife shook in her quivering hands. The footsteps grew louder as they inched closer and closer to the door.

Roxy steeled her resolve, forcing herself to stop pulling a Chihuahua and protect her friends. The same stupid courage that had bubbled out of her during the first with the monster came back. When the door rattled, Roxy swung open the door, slashing at the figure with the knife.

"Thenk agin, shtupid monster!" she drunkly cried when she noticed she had drawn blood.

Psh, she could totally do this.


	2. Chapter 2

**WindyChild- I hope you enjoy, then! I'm going to try and update as much as possible before school starts back!**

**Chapter 2-**

"Hey, Dirk, did Dave ever text you back?" Terezi asked, leaning forward on her cane. Dirk looked back at her, once again dressed impeccably in eye-scarring scarlet and teal. Even her nails were painted perfectly. Apparently she had spent quite a while at Karkat's party if she had given Kanaya enough time to completely make her over. He still wasn't sure why she had left in the first place. Aside from him and Dave, the only person she was really friends with was John. But whatever. Dirk wasn't about to argue with her- it was a proven fact that Pyropes did not lose arguments.

He checked his phone again, which still had no new texts or voicemails. "No," he sighed.

"Well, I think we should go on in," Jade proposed, peering intently through a dusty window. Jake stood beside her, futilely trying to wipe through the grime so they could get a better look. "Apparently we got here earlier than them. John and Rose haven't called me back either, so they might have gone out for lunch or something first."

Well, Dirk supposed they would waste a little more time. Besides, it wasn't like they were expecting them to arrive early. Since Jade, Jake, and Jane had been on an early morning hike, Dirk had told Dave they would probably be late, since Jake's attention span in forestry wasn't the best, even if he had his cousin and Jane with him. Plus, Terezi and Gamzee had gone to Karkat's place for his birthday party. That he didn't even want. He then threw a tantrum that drove Terezi and Gamzee (after hearing Jane was coming along) over to their hotel. Dirk still didn't know how exactly the blind girl and the stoned juggalo found the right hotel _and _the right room.

Point was, they arrived at the mansion far earlier than expected, and the other group mysteriously weren't answering any phones. Dirk gave the mansion's façade another run over. It didn't look like it had been inhabited in years- maybe decades- so it was bound to be as creepy as John claimed it was. Not that Dirk really cared. He had spent a lot of time in much creepier locations, so he doubted this place would even faze him. After a quick look around, everyone else seemed to share the same idea. Ghosts and haunted houses were stupid, but John had insisted they come anyway. This was probably his first time coming too, by the way he kept talking. Most likely he hadn't been able to convince Karkat or anyone else to come with him, so he had waited until everyone else arrived for the summer.

"If they're not going answer, we're starting without them," Dirk finally sighed, shouldering his bag again. John and the others were supposed to bring supplies, but Dirk figured a little extra wouldn't hurt. Supplies tended to drastically dwindle when everyone was all together like this. Jake, Jade, and Jane still had most of their hiking stuff too, since they figured they might could do some more exploring later. Jane already looked exhausted, though. Dirk had warned her not to tag along with the islanders, but she had argued that she knew her way around the local trails well enough.

Since there was no arguments given, they entered the mansion. "Whoa," Jane awed, looking around at the antique furniture sparsely decorating the entrance hall. Most of it was discolored and dusty from age and disuse, but even Dirk had to agree it had class. If he looked hard enough, he could almost make out a set of classic Japanese rooms. He was already impressed, if that was the case. Jane began poking at the furniture, so Dirk supposed it was time to split up and check out the rest of the mansion. Jane immediately called the first floor, and Gamzee agreed to look around with her.

Jane's look was just terrible. She imploringly stared at Jake, but he was obliviously telling Jade his plans for marshmallow roasting over a fireplace. Dirk elbowed him, directing his attention away from his cousin. He nodded over to Jane, miserably shuffling away from Gamzee. "Huh…? Oh! Splendid idea, chaps! We'll form a party to scout out the first floor for any spooks."

"Thank you!" Jane mouthed, practically gluing herself to Jake's side. Dirk nodded back, following the others upstairs.

The instant he stepped foot into the second floor hallway, a shiver wracked through him. Dirk paused, an uneasiness overcoming him. Something was not right about this floor. Jade turned back in concern. "Uh, are you okay, Dirk?"

"Yeah," he muttered, trying to shake the feeling off. He nervously looked around the floor for anything abnormal, but there was nothing he could find that would make him this uneasy. No creepy mounted animal heads, no Betty Crocker wares, and, most importantly, no annoying stalker children in skull masks. Needless to say, his last trip to Seattle six years ago hadn't exactly been fun. Maybe he just hadn't gotten used to the Washington climate yet. After all, it was _way_ cooler than Texas, even in the middle of summer.

They continued upstairs, not bothering to check all of the rooms on the second floor. Jade and Terezi made small talk, and Dirk just followed behind them. He still had a foreboding, slightly woozy feeling, but the third and fourth floors weren't as bad.

"Maybe you should sit down."

It Dirk a moment to realize Jade was talking to him, now. He blinked, looking back to her. "What?"

"You don't look so good," she explained. Jade led him over to the plush armchair in the study they had ended up in. "Dave won't be very happy if I let you get sick. I'm gonna go and get a water bottle from Jake, okay?"

"No, wait, Jade-" Dirk sighed, seeing as it was no use. She was already out the door, jogging downstairs. He was _fine._ Jade was just too much of a worrywart like Jake.

Terezi cocked an eyebrow, putting her hands on her hips. She turned to face him, looking at the wall beside his head. "Well, you don't exactly sound very good. Please tell me you are not scared of this stupid mansion."

"Of course not. I think it's the air in here or something. Seattle is pretty different from Houston, you know." Dirk stood, ignoring Terezi's slightly concerned frown. He had to suck it up now, or Jade and Terezi would have everyone worrying over him. When Dave arrived and saw everyone doing the aforementioned freaking out, he would also freak out and refuse to leave his side for the rest of the night. The kid was like a freaking koala, and Dirk was his eucalyptus tree. He helped her back downstairs, ignoring every cackle about how wimpy he was.

When they reached the second floor, three loud echoes cracked through the air. Terezi and Dirk came to a halt, whipping their heads to the floor. "Those were gun shots," Terezi unnecessarily pointed out.

"Jake," Dirk breathed. He bolted downstairs, leaving Terezi to fend for herself. The foyer was empty, but a table had been knocked over, a vase shattered on the floor. There were skid marks on the cracked marble, like someone had backpedaled out of harm's way. Finally Dirk saw the empty shells of Jake's guns (which he had bought the second they got off the plane- _Because one simply cannot be caught unawares without protection when the moment arises!_) Jake's amazing ability to make unintentional innuendos about _everything _aside, Dirk knew he wouldn't fire at anything in an abandoned mansion. He was a bit on the slow side, and a total wimp, but surely spiders didn't scare him _that _much, right?

"Jake!" Dirk shouted, peeking into hallways. He checked out the tatami rooms, but there hadn't been any sign of struggle in either of them. The foyer was the only place the fight could have happened. He took off down the right hallway, passing an open door to a darkened library. He heard something glass shatter in the kitchen, accompanied by a shriek from Jane. "JANE!"

Dirk's mouth popped open when he entered the kitchen. He dimly heard Terezi yelling after him down the hallway, but he paid her no mind. The huge gray monster fighting Gamzee was a more pressing issue than dealing with an angry blind girl. Jane and Gamzee turned when Dirk entered, giving the monster the opportunity to backhand Gamzee. He fell with an _oof!_, clubs flying out of his hands. Jane screamed again when the monster made a grab for her. She grabbed Gamzee's hand and dragged him out of the monster's way. Dirk snapped out of his shock, diving into the action. He grabbed a steak knife from a rack on the counter, stabbing it into the monster's beefy arm. It recoiled back, and Dirk gave it a solid kick to the stomach. He grabbed another knife and threw it, stabbing the thing in the chest.

He jumped back, avoiding the monster's hand. Gamzee still hadn't recovered from the blow it gave him, dazedly sitting up with Jane's help and pleading. The monster let out a roar, rumbling something along the lines of _You won't escape_. Well, if that wasn't creepy, Dirk didn't know what was. But he didn't have time to be freaked out. The monster pulled out the knives like they were thorns, throwing them to the ground. Dirk backed into wall, trapped between the fridge and counter. The monster lumbered towards him.

A flash of red suddenly barreled into his vision. _Dave_, wielding a nasty cool katana, slashed at the monster, shoving it away. "_First Roxy and now my bro?_" he yelled, further hacking at it with a fury Dirk didn't Dave had in him. Dave cried out as he stabbed his sword through the monster. Dirk gaped again when the monster _vanished._ He reached out to steady Dave, wobbling on his feet. Dave caught himself, though, and sheathed his katana. He had fastened it to his belt, which now hung across his torso. Dirk was impressed- with the katana on his back like that, the orange nicely popping out against his red leather jacket, Dave looked like a modern samurai. After a huff, he turned to Dirk. "Good to see you finally joined the party," he muttered. "Hey, is _It _okay over there?"

"Shut up," Gamzee grumbled, standing on his own wobbly legs. He shook his head, whipping his mess of dark hair around. Most of the face paint on his cheek had been wiped off when he was smacked, revealing nicely tanned California skin.

Slamming the door open and making everyone shout out, Terezi jumped into the room, swinging her cane in the air. Jane had to duck to avoid being smacked in the face. "NEVER FEAR, REDGLARE IS HERE!" she cried, running towards Dave and Dirk. She slipped on the broken plate and slammed into the counter. "Dang it."

"Fight's over, TZ," Dave sighed. He gave the broken plate at her feet a curt, confused glare before clasping his hands. "So, I expect you guys have questions out the wazoo. So do I. Let's get this train moving to our safe room."

"Wait," Dirk interrupted. "Jane, what happened to Jade and Jake? I heard gunshots a minute ago."

"That thing came out of nowhere and started charging us! Jake shot at it, but I think that only made it angry. The monster must have knocked us out for minute or something, because Jake was gone when I opened my eyes. The monster started chasing _us_, so we ran in here," Jane explained, leaning up against the wall. Her eyes were still wide in shock behind her askew glasses. As if the thought just occurred to her, she resettled the ruby frames on the bridge of her nose. "And I thought Jade went with you two."

Dirk sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Jade went back downstairs to get some water from Jake. Maybe she got caught up in the fight too. I doubt she would have left Jake to fight it by himself. Ugh. If they got eaten-"

"Don't talk like that!" Dave snapped, punching his arm. "Roxy went missing sometime last night! She has to be somewhere in the mansion, or Rose is going to murder all of us in a very morbid, grotesque way. I have a feeling she'll sacrifice us to her stupid Horrorterrors or whatever she calls them."

"Roxy's gone? And wait a minute! What do you mean, last night? Last night we went to John's house to watch Con Air!" Jane burst.

Dave looked to the floor. "Like I said," he slowly iterated, "we'll get you guys up to speed at the safe room. Rose and John are probably freaking out that I'm not back yet, anyway."

Jane and Dirk exchanged a nervous look before filing in line after him, Gamzee, and Terezi.

Dave leaned away from the library as he passed it, shooting it a glare. "Freaking libraries," he muttered. Upstairs, he led them down the hall, ignoring the elegant furniture and interior design. Dave didn't even give the place a second glance, like he was already well-used to seeing the mansion. He stopped at a door at the far end of the front hall, rapping impatiently against the wood. "Guys, I'm back, and I found the others. I also killed Steve again."

"Steve?" Jane whispered.

"While Rose was recovering from her panic attack after we found Roxy gone, John tried to distract her by brainstorming names for the monster. Before I left, he decided on Steve. Heck if I know."

John opened the door, sticking his frowning face outside. "Because Steve is evil. You watched Blue's Clues when you were a kid, too, so you know what I mean."

"No, Blue's Clues was awesome. So shut up," Dave snapped, shoving past him. Rose sat at the meeting table, dumping everything out of John and Roxy's backpacks. "You've reorganized our things seven times, Rose."

"Shut up, Strider."

He spun away, raising his hands in defense. "Whatever. Okay, guys, take a seat. Since Rose is preoccupied and I've already saved your butts today, John can explain what's going on. Hit it, Egbert."

John waited until Dave had locked the door back, spinning the key on his finger. When he joined the table, placing his katana at his side, John cleared his throat and began. "Well, we came to the mansion yesterday at around… four, I think? Anyway, we figured we'd go on in and wait for you guys to come later. We split up to look around. Dave, Rose, and Roxy covered the first floor, I went upstairs. I ran into Steve on the fourth floor. He chased me into the third floor library and locked me in. Downstairs, apparently, Roxy and Rose ran into Steve too, and absconded to the second floor. Dave heard Roxy scream, saw Steve, and went looking for them. He found Rose first in the room with the weird metal door, then they found Roxy hiding out in one of the bedrooms. Steve found them, Dave stole some katanas and kicked Steve's butt. They went looking for me. I finally got Dave's attention. He went looking for the key in the first floor library. Apparently Steve popped up again or something, but _someone's _too chicken to tell us what really happened."

Dave hurled an empty Tab can at his head. John ducked and stuck out his tongue. "Anyway, he let me out. Since the front door is locked and I found a key to this room in the library, we went here for the night. Roxy lost Rock, Paper, Scissors and had to stand guard. When we woke up this morning, she was gone. Rose started to panic, so I stayed here to calm her down while Dave went out looking for her. Then you guys popped up! Great going, guys."

"If you would have replied to that stupid text, we wouldn't have come," Terezi grumbled.

"Oh, yeah, our phones don't work either. Like, not only is there no service out here in the middle of nowhere, but when we try to use them for anything, it is a big, glitchy mess." John pulled out his phone to use as an example. He pushed the button to go to his contacts and held it out for examination. Dirk cocked an eyebrow at the awful sight. The letters were all scrunched together, and random multicolored blocks absently flashed in random places. John put it back in his pocket and shrugged. "Our watches are pretty crazy too. It's like there is a weird magnetic pull or something."

Dirk frowned, letting the information soak in. "So… we can only assume time is screwed up in here, because it was three o'clock when we came in. We've only been here about half an hour and… yep, looks like it is noon outside. When we entered the mansion, we must have been set to your time."

"But I don't get how any of this possible," Jane said. "I mean, giant monsters? Time shenanigans? This is like a sci-fi writer's dream."

"Or someone's Halloween prank on crack," Terezi supposed. She turned to John, scowling behind her red shades.

"I swear I knew nothing of this!" he promised. "The people at school failed to mention the mansion had Steve running around in the nude. They never mentioned any of this weird stuff. I mean, it seemed like a pretty crappy haunted house. I just thought it would be fun to get together and goof off in here."

Rose sighed, finally pushing the supplies aside. "This is not John's fault. This is not anyone's fault. Regardless of what is going on in this mansion, our objective remains the same: we have to figure out where Roxy wandered off and find an exit."

"Jake and Jade too," Jane added. "St-Steve attacked us while Dirk, Terezi, and Jade went upstairs. It knocked Gamzee and me unconscious for a little while. When we awoke, Jake was gone and Steve was coming towards us. We ran into the kitchen, Gamzee got backhanded-" Dave snorted, Gamzee finally looked away from the ceiling to cast him a scowl. "-then Dirk and Dave popped up and killed it. Or made it disappear. Whatever."

"Is anyone else cold in here?" John asked, rubbing his arms.

Rose shrugged. "I guess we can start up a fire in the fireplace. Here are some matches, and I guess we can burn that box over there?"

John left the table to put his fire-starting skills to test. When he only succeeded in making smoke, Jane joined him before he had the whole room as black as his face. "Anyway, like Rose said, we need to look for Roxy, Jake, and Jade," Dirk said. "Jake was on the first floor and Roxy was up here, but I'm not sure which floor Jade was on when she disappeared. They could have all run into each other, as far as we know."

"If not, then they're all running around lost, and it'll take forever to find them," Terezi sighed. She leaned back in her seat, lacing her fingers. "Our best bet would to split up and look for them. With the screwy time, though, we might end up lost ourselves. I suppose going in groups would be best, then. We could each take a floor and look around. When the sky starts to get dark, we could come back and share our findings."

John and Jane suddenly cried out. Letting out a triumphant "aha!" John used the poker beside the fireplace to pick out a key from the burning box. Jane poured some water over it to cool it down. "Looks like it says 'Study, 1st Floor'," she reported. "I think this might go to the locked door past the tatami rooms."

"Great!" John grinned. "Rose and I can check it out!"

"But what if the time is different on every floor?" Rose asked, picking up the discussion where Terezi left off. "It could appear to get dark on the first floor, while on the third it would still be daylight. I'm not sure if we should take that chance. Steve appears to be the only being who has made sense of the time, and that is why it's always able to find us."

No sooner than she had mentioned it, there was a heavy thud on the door. Dave pulled out his katana again. "Well, so much for this being a safe room. Rose, hate to burst your bubble, but we're gonna have to split up. I'll stay here and hold it off, you guys do your thing."

Gamzee stood and cracked his neck. "Actually, I think I need to teach this Steve guy a little lesson."

"I'll stay too and make sure you two don't kill each other while you're fighting Steve," Terezi kindly said. She tapped her cane on the floor, judging how much it could withstand without breaking. But even if it did break, it wasn't like there were no other cane-like objects in the mansion. She could always bully Dave into finding her something new. Also, Gamzee was too much of a sweetheart to fight the scary monster by himself, and Karkat would never forgive her if she got his best friend beat up any further.

Dave jumped back when he opened the door, dodging Steve's massive hand. Apparently it had gotten the memo that slapping wasn't killing them fast enough, for this time it had balled its hand into a fist. "John, Rose, first floor! Bro, Jane, third floor! When we're done here-" he ducked to let Gamzee whack at Steve with his clubs. "-we'll cover the second floor. Meet up top in the fourth floor study!"

Dirk nodded, practically pulling Jane out the door. Rose followed after them, but John nervously lingered in the doorway. "Be careful!"

"We will! Now move it, John!"

Terezi nudged the door closed with her cane before taking a run towards Steve. She could tell exactly where it was thanks to all the stomping it was doing. Honestly, Steve almost reminded her of Karkat during one of his tantrums. She cackled as she slapped her cane against Steve's back. She felt it bend, but didn't hear it crack. Excellent. Gamzee must have covered her, for Steve didn't immediately go after her. She heard the monster growl out a garbled threat before it stomped away from her and Gamzee, who's breathing told her he was standing next to her. "Dave!" she warned, since he was Steve's only target.

Gamzee grabbed her wrist, pulling her along. "Come on!" he shouted. He released Terezi when they were behind Steve. At the same time, the slung their cane and clubs down on Steve's back, making it fall to its knees. Dave drove his sword into Steve's chest. With a dim roar, it disappeared once again.

"Miracles, man," Gamzee dreamily sighed. Dave gave him a short look before lifting Terezi's hand and high-fiving it. She did the same with Gamzee, so he wouldn't feel left out. He didn't actually feel left out, nor did he really care, but whatever. He was just glad the Mirthful Messiahs had granted him the miracle of beating Steve. With Terezi and Dave's help, of course, but it was definitely still a miracle. Dave left to retrieve the huge hiking backpacks Rose had left when she ran out the door. He handed the other one to Gamzee, explicitly telling him not to fill it up with his stupid clown stuff. Especially the bicycle horns- it didn't matter if Dave hadn't seen any yet, because he knew from too many horrifying experiences that Gamzee never went _anywhere_ without somehow smuggling a pile of them in.

While she left the boys to the manual labor, Terezi poked around in the shelves lining the walls. All she felt were crusty old books, well worn from age and use. A few felt a little newer- these had mostly likely been rebound long ago. Finally, her fingers grazed something that felt like glass. She spread her fingers to feel across the surface and ran into some nicked wood. Terezi lifted the clock to her ear. Her eyes widened to not only hear it ticking, but to hear it ticking wildly.

Terezi dropped the clock when a phone rang. Even Dave cried out in surprise. Gamzee slowly reached into his pocket. Sure enough, his worn and beaten cell phone was vibrating with each ring. "_Another _miracle!" he gushed.

Dave plucked it out of his hand and answered the call. "Hello? Hey, is anybody-"

A curt piano key cut him off. The call disconnected immediately after. Dave warily held the phone out, looking down at the screen. It was blocky and messed up again. He mashed the keys, but nothing worked. With a sigh, he handed the phone back to Gamzee. "I heard a piano. A single key. I swear I will slowly rip John Egbert apart if that was actually him."

"His phone doesn't work either," Terezi reminded him.

"But who else would randomly call, play the piano, and hang up?" Dave demanded. He irritably ran a hand through his hair, beginning to pace. "Do you think _Steve _would do it? Because I doubt he can hit one note with those beefy fingers. Dirk and Jane aren't stupid enough to waste a call like that."

"I don't know who would have done it. Just calm down, Dave. Besides, John is downstairs with Rose. It couldn't have been him. Anyway, you guys need to look at this clock. Is thing really as old as it felt?"

Dave blinked, noticing the clock for the first time. He joined Terezi in the floor, poking at it with her cane. "I am beginning to believe it is possessed, because this clock and its battery are far too old to pull this off," she calmly stated, scooting it closer to him.

Gamzee butted in between them with a frown. "Maybe it is possessed. Can I smash it?"

"Dude, why?" Dave asked.

"Well, it's not like there's a problem with smashing it. Why not let him break it?" When Dave sighed in defeat, Terezi let out a cackle and moved out of the way for Gamzee to work his magic. He withdrew an afore-predicted bicycle horn (which Dave hissed at) and honked it contentedly. He then slammed his clubs into the haywire clock.

Dave literally fell back when something slammed into his chest. His initial worry was that Steve was back, but a scene invaded his mind, wrenching it away from thoughts of the monster or the danger they were in. The vision was so vivid- Dave could hear the trees gently swishing above him, could almost smell the forest and Roxy's booze. No, wait… Roxy wasn't with them. She overslept, and decided to come with the others after they left Karkat's party. Dave looked away from the trees and faced his friends. John's goofy face grinned at him from beside Rose, and Dirk curiously looked up at the house. Probably sharing his thoughts of how lame this idea was. But whatever. When in Seattle, do as the Egberts do.

As soon as he blinked, it was gone. Dave sat staring at the bookcase, which Terezi and Gamzee were crouched in front of. The broken clock lay between them. Dave uncertainly gazed at it a moment longer before shaking his head and dusting off his white jeans. Not that they were very white anymore. This mansion was filthy. "Are you okay, Dave?" Terezi asked, furrowing her light brown eyebrows. Rolling his eyes (and then informing her that he did so), Dave assured her he was fine. Maybe he was just dizzy from hunger or something. He hadn't eaten anything besides a granola bar since yesterday afternoon, and maybe his headache had come from fighting Steve so often on an empty stomach?

"Come on, guys. We have to start looking for… for, uh, Jade and Jake," Dave awkwardly said. He shook his head again, trying to get rid of the funny feeling he had. It was almost like he had forgotten something.

"And Roxy."

Dave paused. He looked over his shoulder at Terezi, standing in that suspicious pose of hers. "You failed to mention Roxy. She's missing too, right?"

"Of course I mentioned Roxy."

"No, you didn't," she stubbornly insisted.

She reached out the back of her hand. Dave smacked it away. "I am not sick, okay? You just misheard me or something. Seriously, we need to get a move on before Steve decides to come back for the after-party."

Terezi still frowned, scowling in the direction of his voice. She huffily sighed when she heard his footsteps begin to walk away from her. She hooked her arm through Gamzee's and pointed forward with her cane. "Whatever. Let's go, Gamzee."

He honked his horn in assent, making Dave cringe. A pleasant smile unfurled on his face when he fell into skipping step with Terezi, swinging their arms.

Dave paid them little attention, mechanically checking each room on the floor. That feeling still bothered him- the feeling of forgetfulness he had gotten after that weird episode of his. Had he forgotten about Roxy after all…? No, that was impossible. Rose had been worried sick about her all morning. Dave couldn't possibly forget about her after all he'd gotten from Rose and John. But, really, it didn't matter anyway. Dave didn't have time to stand around thinking about stupid stuff like this. He had a still-stoned juggalo and a blind girl to look after while they searched for their missing friends. The sooner they finished looking around, the sooner he could tackle Jane for some of her delicious cupcakes.

_Dem cupcakes._


End file.
